Crowded Silence

I’ve learned to look composed,  
even when my thoughts are sprinting in opposite directions  
dragging my chest behind them.  

I can be laughing with someone  
while a whole other version of me  
is curled up in the corner of my mind,  
begging the noise to stop.  

It’s strange—  
how I can feel abandoned in a room full of people,  
how I can feel too much and not enough  
in the same breath.  

I keep my voice soft,  
my hands still,  
my expression gentle—  
because if I let even one feeling slip,  
the rest will flood out  
and drown the floor.  

No one ever suspects the quiet ones  
are the ones holding back a tidal wave.

-𝕃ℝ 🖤 

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